If you followed along over the weekend, we hosted a birthday party for our Leo. My husband and I looked at each other, once we were home and polishing off the open wine, that we are finally getting the hang of this thing! We come by it honestly. We learned, the hard way, that it is extremely easy to haze yourself, over plan and make the day extremely stressful. For Madrid’s first birthday, we had a caterer, cater waiters, a jumpy princess house, a ball pit, hosted it at my parent’s house {complete with a pool, we had to make sure no body feel into}, and about 60 people. Ever since, when birthday season starts {we have 8 family birtdays in 6 weeks}, we brainstorm about 10 things for the party and then knock the list in half. {see Leo’s Birth Story posts.}
Here are my pointers on how to throw an easy toddler birthday party.
Keep it Small
As I shared above, there is no reason to invite everyone who has ever met your child. This becomes easier once they are in school, so you can pair the list of invites down to who your child actually interacts with on a weekly basis. I don’t recommend inviting everyone from their class. While this may seem mean, then you are setting the precedent for everyone to do the same. Do you want every single Saturday for the rest of the school year to be spent singing ‘Happy Birthday’ to Jimmy and Susie? I don’t think so. Plus, more people, more food, more wine and more problems, i.e. Noise.
Stick with a Theme
This year, Leo wanted Spider-Man. While I wanted more of a cute construction theme, with a digging station, chicken nuggets in dumb trucks on the table and hard hats as party favors, this is not what Leo wanted. I thought about combining the two, but that just made more work for me. He wanted Spider-Man, so everything, as much as it pained me, was plastic red and Marvel themed.
Order Plates and Flatware Online
I had a bunch of these construction themed plates from birthday parties past, but to follow my own advice from above, I ordered this party kit, which came with table cloth, plates, cups and napkins. Thank goodness I checked the package the week of, because I almost forgot flatware.
Pick the Food the Month Before, Order the Week Before
To go with what I was planning as a construction themed party, I was going to have chicken nuggets in dump trucks on the table. To follow my own advice to sticking with a theme, I let this idea go. I decided we were going to order deli sandwiches and Chick-Fil-A the month before. When I was talking about his party with the birthday boy, he said he didn’t want nuggets and instead wanted pizza. Not only did I want him happy, but this change in menu made everything easier. Pizza gets delivered. Since we did our birthday party at our Country Club, I was able to call my favorite restaurant manager the day before and arrange everything. They even did salad and a fruit platter and brought it to the playground at the specified time. The only thing I had to do was get ice and pick up the sandwich platters the morning of. No cooking, no food prep. Easy.
Don’t Tell Your Kids Everything
To stick with the theme, we decided for Spider-Man to make an appearance. Since Madrid had Elsa and Ana at her birthday the year before, I am worried that my kids not think this is what happens at birthdays. Either way, I decided it was perfect. He would help with the cake, do face painting and entertain the kids. When Elsa and Ana came to Madrid’s birthday the previous year, this, not only keep the kids entertained, but let the parents chit chat and catch up.
Welp….Spider-Man didn’t show.
I have now learned, not to tell your kids everything. If Leo and Madrid didn’t know, it would have made everything fine. Yet, they kept asking where he was and Mardid, not the birthday boy, Leo, is the one who was the most upset, {besides me. You should have heard me on the phone to the company…}
So, if Spider-Man or Elsa is due to make an appearance, make it a surprise, in case they are a no show. Stayed tuned tomorrow for my solution to this problem…
Pick a Playground
A playground, or outdoor space makes it easy, but harder, in my opinion. Pros: the kids have something to do, it isn’t at your house, you don’t have to clean your house before or after, bathrooms are at their own risk. Cons: you have to bring everything and plan for shade. I was going to order one of these. But when I went to check the park the week before, I realized I could use all my hours at OrangeTheory to good use and move some picnic tables under the trees. Minimal prep required.
No Presents!
Like your kid/your house/your playroom needs more stuff. Amiright? And then, no thank you notes!
2-3 Hours TOPS
While I personally love birthdays, I also like my Saturdays. I like to be with my family, have leisurely workouts, where I am not rushing to get back for my husband to have time to workout before he has to be at work himself and generally enjoy the non work day. I don’t love going to birthday parties and really only go to my real friends’ ones and the ones that don’t mess with nap time, especially on a Saturday. If you make the party 2 hours, then your friends, and YOU, still have 22 hours of Saturday to enjoy.
Ask Your Kids Who to Invite
Not only does this make it the most fun for them, but then if you end up excluding someone, you can blame the child of the hour. There were many friends that we didn’t invite this time, that have been invited years past. But, I asked Leo who he wanted and he listed three friends, so I invited three friends, {and their parents and siblings}, which also plays into my piece of advice to keep it small.
Get Your Parents and Spouse Involved
My parents, in-laws and brother and his family all live close by. While nobody from my side of the family was there, my in-laws and husband were extremely helpful. They made it fun for Leo and hung with our friends. We stayed at the playground after everyone left and finished the champagne that was open, while the kids continued to play on the playground.
One Word: Wine.
I don’t know why, for the life of me, that 100% of the time, these things don’t have booze. If I am giving up my Saturday to come have my kids be topped up with sugar and their faces painted with what will, inevitably, end up all over the sheets, I would like a glass of wine. So I will provide the same for you. Most of the time, people may have a glass, or even two, but it is a nice jester.
Make the Goody Bag Simple
I used to go all out. Buying endless plastic and small choking hazard toys, making each bag fairly the same, having ones for the boys and different ones for the girls and gifting them at the end of the party. This. Serves. No one. The plastic is bad for our landfills and trade deals with China. The small toys are bad quality and choking hazards for those kids with younger siblings. And you don’t get the bang for your buck. I got Leo’s friends these Spiderman masks for when they arrived and these activity books for when they left. I got word from everyone that the activity books were a hit, even the next day and no assembly required for yours truly. Madrid is having a ‘Frozen’ birthday, where we are going to the movies, and I am truly thinking of making the movie ticket the goodie bag.
As always DM or email me with any questions for help when planning your own party, or just to bounce ideas off of. I am going to reread this when I begin to plan Madrid’s birthday in a couple weeks. While some of these tips might seem harsh, this is what I have found works best for you to minimize the haze and maximize the enjoyment! You should celebrate too!

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